Black Star
by 8secretkeeper6
Summary: A story of revelations of Merlin and Camelot
1. A SURPRISE LIKE NO OTHER

I

Merlin walked into what had been home the past five years and discovered an unusual mix of men surrounding the examining table. The King, Arthur, Gawain and Gaius hunched closely and whispered furiously. Urgency climbed from Merlin's toes to his brain.

"Everything alright?" He asked tentively, he wasn't sure if he wanted to really know the answer. The group cohesively looked to him earnestly, as they moved he was able to make out a girl around his age with blood covering her body, her clothes tattered and she was so pale Merlin assumed she was already dead. Except her lips were moving slightly, but he couldn't hear what she was saying. Gaius bent over and listened intently, his eyes were browed when he rose.

"What is she saying?" Arthur questioned nervously, keeping his eye line away from king Uther. It took Gaius a moment to answer, he appeared confused as he looked at Arthur, he was trying to make sense of it.

"Black Star" he answered.

Merlin's legs ran before his heart could take a beat.

"I gather you understand what that means." Uther stated in his usual judgmental way. Merlin didn't answer him; he scanned the pale girl that laid helplessly before him. It couldn't be her. She died.

"Merlin…." Arthur began, but stopped by Gaius.

"Give him a moment sire, he may be able to get us some answers."

Merlin bent down to listen to her moving lips as she repeated those words. Her voice was barely a whisper as she fought through the pain to speak, her breath was shallow as he heard her say "Black Star." The swelling of his heart spilled out through his eyes.

"Kathryn" His voice cracked as he dared to say her name and caress her wounded cheek. Her lips stopped moving, her breathing faltered, and her eyes fluttered open. It was her! No one had eyes like that, solid blue circle on the outside and specs of gold blue and silver mixed in the center. Her eyes bulged in recognition and she jolted up and wrapped her arms around him, but with a great lack of strength.

"It's imperative that she lays down Merlin, I have not finished my diagnosis, and she could have more injuries internally." Gaius ordered, so gently Merlin placed Kathryn back on the table and spoke two words in her ear.

"Black Star."

She smiled and whispered his name, "Merlin."

II

The noblemen left the room, leaving Merlin and Gaius to talk.

"Hot water?" Merlin asked immediately wanting to help. The exhaustion he felt earlier had faded and adrenaline was rushing through his body.

"I have enough for now." Gaius returned, solely focusing on the unconscious female. "How do you know her Merlin?"

Merlin remembered the days in sunshine with Will and Kathryn in Eiildor, ten years since he had seen the girl before him.

"We grew up together. She is Will's sister." He answered before he was able to think about Will, did she know that he was dead? Would he have to tell her? She would be alone, with no one. Unless, she had someone….OH NO! Will claimed to have magic! Would Arthur tell Uther? Will she die? He can loose her now!

"Merlin!" Arthur's voice boomed. Behind him. "Come with me." No time was wasted; Arthur immediately walked away, Merlin followed.

"What's going on?" Merlin asked trying to keep up.

"We're going on a quest."

"What kind of quest?"

"Looking for a Farloopis Flower."

"Why?"

"Because your friend in there is near death and Gaius said that it would help, she has answers so when we heal here, then we will know who we were fighting in the woods."

Merlin stopped dead. "Black Star."

"What?" Arthur responded annoyed.

"How long is the journey?"

"We shall return in three days."

"Will that be soon enough?"

Gawain turned the corner. "Who is she to you Merlin?"

"An old friend. We grew up together; I thought she was dead already."

"What do you mean?" Arthur asked.

"She disappeared ten years ago, in the middle of the night she screamed in the woods, and no one ever found her."

"Well, she's still got a chance." Arthur encouraged sweetly, putting an arm around him.

_For now _ Merlin thought to himself, but he still smiled in optimism. He was determined to find this flower, no matter what he had to do.

III

After he finished packing Arthur's gear, he snuck back to see Kathryn. Gaius had fallen asleep in his chair; Merlin grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around the old man's body. Walking up next to her Merlin shook, his heart was heavy; he wanted so desperately to speak to her, tell her that it would be ok, he'd save her. Protect her. He giggled thinking about how she used to protect him all the time, telling him to not do things when she thought he may get hurt. She was always right, she would shove him out of the way, stop him from doing his magic in front of someone he didn't know was there, she knew before Will did. In all ways she was the person who really knew everything about him. He grabbed her hand, her delicate and bruised hand, and whispered in her ear.

"I'll be back soon. Don't give up on me." She let out a deep breath, as if she was answering him. He would imagine it was for him, it made him feel better anyway.

IV

Time seemed slow enough and they didn't seem fast enough, but Arthur Gawain and Merlin managed to find themselves just one hour away from their destination before the sun started to set. Not many words were spoken between them as they set up camp, no special retorts from Arthur, just general silence. Merlin was thankful for that, he was not in the mind range to really invest in any kind of conversation, He was past the point of exhaustion, and just wanted to rest, but then he felt guilty because he wanted to desperately to get back to Kathryn.

Merlin started the fire while Arthur and Gawain were distracted with the horses, it always felt good to use magic, it was as if life rushed through his body. He only wished he could use it to help more.

"We should get some sleep." Arthur offered as he sat across the fire. They sat in silence for a minute while Arthur stared Merlin down, but Merlin averted his eyes. "Merlin, she is going to be ok."

"Why are you doing this?" Merlin asked, really not sure of why he never asked before.

Gawain sat in between them, he glanced at Arthur. "What are you two not telling me?"

A deep sigh left Arthurs body as he braced himself.

"Merlin, we didn't find her, alone. We were attacked by three men, she was unconscious when we first spotted her, but the men were on us so fiercely that we could only react to them."

Gawain nodded in agreement. "Yes, and they were well trained in combat. I was taken aback. Thrown down a hill."

"They were all three upon me" Arthur continued "It wasn't looking very good, but then…"

He trailed off; obviously trying to put the images he was seeing into words. " I was down on the ground, they were all around me, I saw no exit. But then one was gone, then another, and finally I took out the last. When I turned I saw her, sword in hand and in fighting stance, she was bleeding, bruised, weak, but so determined." His voice was dripping in baffled respect.

"Then I found my way back." Gawain continued "she was not backing down."

"We told her that we would not harm her, her eyes welled up in tears, and she asked ..." Arthur trailed again and coughed fighting back emotions. "She asked if we were going to take her away if we would make her safe. We promised her that we would. She sighed and said 'good I don't think I could take another beating.' "

Merlin was invoked with anger, but he fought his hardest to fight it, but the thought of anyone putting a hand on her….he wanted to kill them.

"When I took my sword from her she said 'thank you' and then fell in to my arms." Gawain finished. They waited for Merlin to say something, but he didn't have any words. _Another beating_, did that mean it happened often? Were there other injuries? Where had she been for so long? Was it worse than death? All the questions and no answers. The adrenaline was too much Merlin got up and gathered his things.

"Merlin what are you doing?" Arthur asked urgently.

"I'm not going to make her wait for me."

"This is not a good idea, it's almost dark."

"I'll go alone."

"Merlin I order you to stop."

Merlin stopped, and then continued walking. "Leave me or kill me"

Arthur grabbed his sword. "Gawain stays here and watches the horses." He followed Merlin.

"Merlin, this is not a good idea."

"I don't care, I have to do this."

"We will. Just don't lose your head, that's how mistakes happen." Arthur kept pace, Merlin slowed and let Arthur pass him.

"That's it?" he asked surprised. Arthur looked back in confusion.

"What's it?" he responded.

"You're just going to come?"

"Yes,"

"You just ordered me to not go"

"Yes I did, but you care about her don't you?"

"I do."

"Merlin you have helped me when I needed it most for people I cared about. Your life was on the line and you were on board every time. Don't you think I would do the same for you?" Merlin didn't really have an answer for that. So Arthur continued "why do you offer your affections to her?"

There were so many reasons, but Merlin couldn't think of any in particular. That didn't stop him from trying to explain though, "She was truly the only person who knew me, still is I think."

"What is Black Star?"

"She always felt invisible, not important, even though she I one of the brightest things in the world."

"Like a star."

"It never suited her to be called a star, which is what Will and I called her all the time, so we compromised to Black star, beautifully hidden." He remembered the look on her face the first time he called her that, she felt so special, he enjoyed making her smile, not many could, but he was able.


	2. PAIN AND CONFUSION

V

The pain. The ridiculous pain. She felt safe. She couldn't remember the last time she really felt safe. Dare she open her eyes?

It was night, and the candles were faint, after a few blinks the blur subsided, she sat up slowly, getting the full impact of her injuries. She felt an internal illness; she looked at her bandaged arm, dragon venom. Had to be. She glanced around the room, and found a man sleeping in a chair behind her. He was older. The medicine man. She tiptoed, not wanting to wake him, feeling a strong urge to go through the door in the back. Three steps were in her way, she took a breath and stepped. Her heart began beating faster, another breath and another step. She became dizzy so she hurried the last step and opened the door.

The smell of the room, so familiar. She couldn't place it. The window was open, the moon shone brightly, she made her way to it and glanced at the world upon her. How did she get here? The wooziness was overpowering, she wouldn't make it back to the table, so she rested in the bed that was in the room. Why didn't the medicine man use it? The pillow held that scent that she remembered, but she grew unconscious before she could figure it out.


	3. SHOCKING REVELATION

VI

A loud crash sucked her from the beautiful dream, with a surge of adrenaline she lurched out of bed, her survival instincts kicked in and she hid behind the wardrobe, no weapons around except a belt. That could work. The world was spinning, her dream was still with her and she expected that her brother would come up behind her, the dragon venom was working fast, making her hold onto the wall to stay standing.

She stopped breathing when she heard the door unlatch and open. She gripped the belt tightly in her hands; she would have to be on the defense, never the side she preferred.

"Kathryn?" a voice softly whispered, it was a voice of wisdom, the owner had been witnessed to many things both glorious and terrorizing. "Kathryn," it continued like music, "I am not going to bring you any harm; I am here to help you." She remained in her place, but her world was growing dim, her legs felt heavy. "Merlin informed us that your name was Kathryn, is that correct?" Her hear stopped, everything did, the sounds of the earth, the movement of the wind, everything, only one thing hung in the air. Merlin.

She evacuated her hiding place and found the medicine man sitting on the bed, he knew exactly where she was, it wasn't the best cover obviously. Her veins were on fire, her hands were freezing and she started to sweat, she was near the end, _no¸_ she thought, _not until I see him. _The medicine man could help her.

"Hello there," He smiled as he stood. "My name is Gaius. You are Kathryn aren't you?" She nodded tears beginning to well up in her eyes. "Merlin will be thrilled."

"Where am i?" she forced out, her throat was coarse, and it hurt to speak.

"Camelot."

"CAMELOT!" she should have known, something had to have been wrong in order for her to feel safe. She leapt to run, but fell in the floor hitting her head on the bed, blood gushed from her wound, Gaius lifted her gently.

"you have no reason to be afraid my dear."

"I must go. Its not safe."

"No one can hurt you." He grabbed a cloth and pressed it against her head, trying to subdue the bleeding.

"You said you knew Merlin."

"Yes I do."

"How do you know him?"

"I for lack of a better word am his guardian, he lives with me, this is his room actually." That was it. Her safe harbor was Merlin, the smell she couldn't quite figure out. It was different, but the same. Kind of like a wine that gets richer with age, her heart grew heavy. She took the cloth from Gaius, " Thank you so much for all you have done, but I must go."

" Why is that?" he asked concerned, it was a good feeling to feel cared about, but this was something she could not negotiate.

" If I don't go. It will be the end for many."


	4. THE GARDEN

VII

Arthur had seen Merlin do incredible things, brave, selfless things, but his determination to save this Kathryn was impressive. The emotional rollercoaster Merlin must be going through, his friend was alive, but dying. To loose her twice, just didn't seem fair.

Arthur thought of Gwen, how much she meant to him, if Merlin felt half of that, their failure would be heartbreaking in massive proportions.

"This is going to be tricky." He observed standing outside the gate to the mysterious garden. Gaius had mentioned the unique containments and that it would be very obvious which flower they would require. The lock upon the gate was unlike anything he had ever seen before, and there was no key anywhere insight. He'd have to break it, but how?

"There must be a way of opening it." Merlin claimed breathlessly also surveying the area, "ill look this way." He ordered, something Arthur let slide from time to time, when they were alone it didn't bother him, only in public did he have to get angry. It was expected. He made his way to the other side of the garden; it was in a circular shape, the only greenery around the mountainous area, if only he could see inside. The outer wall was made of strong vines and roses. Not red. Purple. He picked one and placed it inside his lapel for Gwen on his return home.

"ARTHUR!" Merlin yelled from the opening, with no hesitation he ran to him, he found the gate open and a light coming from inside, " Did you find the key?" he asked finding Merlin standing in front of a large flower it was almost half the size of him and was the most exquisite aqua color with a black stem. "I think this is probably it." Merlin suggested looking around to find nothing else, he reached for the flower but stopped just before touching it.

"What is it?" Arthur asked.

"This was too simple."


	5. NOT WHAT IT SEEMS

VIII

As soon as Merlin opened the lock he felt the power of the flower, but there was another energy that he couldn't place. It was too smile, an artifact so magical, left here with just a lock? No there was something sinister molding the situation. Merlin had caution wit every movement he made, every breath he made, he had to keep Arthur safe and more importantly had to get back to Kathryn.

"No one else is here." Arthur grumbled trying to find his feet in the darkness, obviously trying to prepare himself for some sort of attack.

"Just a lock? Anyone could get in." Merlin offered circling the magnificent blossom.

"Clearly." Arthur joked, "How did you get in?" Merlin was anticipating that question, it wasn't as if Arthur was oblivious to his surroundings, not completely.

"I jiggled it. " he answered hoping that would suffice for now. "Do you think it will be safe to pick it?" he continued trying to focus on the important issue at hand. Arthur batted at something that touched his head, it was so dark that neither of them could identify what it could be, but the movement startled them both.

" Gaius," Arthur straighter trying to gain his composure, " mentioned no large obstacles, he just said we needed one peddle." with this answer Merlin nicked two and handed one to Arthur. "Just in case." He answered.

"Lets go get your friend better." with hopeful excitement they began to make their way out of the garden, but it faded as soon as they came across a knight in sparkling white armor that shone its own light in the dark, it was majestic, not one knick or scratch could be found anywhere. He stood with his sword at the ready. Arthur raised his as wellm " You were right Merlin. Too simple."


	6. TRUTH CANT COME TO PASS

IX

Kathryn knew that she wouldn't get too far, but if Gaius could patch her head wound she could make it out o the city by morning, and everyone would remain safe. Getting him to allow her to leave would be a greater obstacle.

"Why do you believe that it will be the end for some if you stay?" he asked genuinely as he cleaned her wound. She couldn't tell him the complete truth, but to get away she would tell him what she could.

" I am not a good person." she stated, she wasn't a bad person either, but there was nothing she was capable of that was truly good. Her answer caused him to chuckle, " What is so humorous?" he took her face in his hands "Bed people, " he explained "don't admit they are bad."

" How do you know that?"

"I've seen a thing or two in my lifetime, " he walked away to clean the cloth, "Arthur had some faith in you, or he wouldn't have brought you back here."

"Prince Arthur?" everything was falling into place, and she could not let that happen. "Please Gaius, I don't trust anyone and i don't ask for help, but considering i am so close to death, i need you."

"Don't be so hasty child, Arthur and Merlin will be back soon with the treatment."

"The Farloopis Flower." her knowledge was so matter of fact that she notice Gauis take a moment to relieve shock.

" Tell me exactly what will happen if you stay."

She couldn't, even though she so desperately wanted to explain everything and have him embrace her in his warm arms, comfort her. She wanted Will. She wanted to be free, but there was no time and worse no chance, Her death was upon her and the last thing she was going to let happen is let everyone me murdered because of her.


	7. WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

Gwen was surprised when Gaius stood on her doorstep at such an unusual hour, something was terribly wrong, she could see it in his face.

" Gaius what is it?" she swallowed as her stepped passed her with such haste, "Gwen i need your aid on a matter of grave importance and with great decorum." he grabbed a wrap and put it around her shoulders.

"What is it Gaius?" he grabbed her hand and headed back to the castle. Gwen had never seen Gaius move with such speed, this odd occurrence causing her heart to be stuck in her throat. Was something wrong with Merlin? Or Arthur? Was it Morgana? Ever since Morgana's attempt on overtaking the throne, Camelot has been on edge, was this about her? She kept pace with him, holding every breath, trying to keep her composure.

When Gaius opened the door, Gwen saw nothing out of the ordinary except bloody bandages on the table.

"Gaius, what has happened?" her fear grew inside her like a flame to paper, her eyes were wide and fierce, " you must tell me. what is wrong?" Gaius took a deep breath trying to gather the words, but before he could speak, another voice broke the stale air.

"What did you do with my bag?" A girl, in torn, bloody clothing and a face as grey as the stone on the wall and eyes as red as a rose, her veins in her neck were twinging underneath her skin, this poor broken girl. "What did you do?" She continued looking at Gaius angrily, glaring at Gwen, who was speechless.

" You cannot go out on your own, especially with ruined garments like that, you will stick out like a sore thumb." Gaius retorted, obviously tired of this repetitive conversation.

"Where is my bag?"

" You can barely stand, how long do you expect to make it all on your own?

" I know im dying Gaius!" Her voice was so weak, but she had a power about her that Gwen felt intimidated. " I just have to get out of the city by morning."

"Why by morning?" Gwen asked, her voice cracked under the pressure. Kathryn smiled, it was beautiful, she was beautiful even through all the cuts and bruises there was a sparkle that just shown through. " Noone can know i am here. I wish I could go into it Guinevere, but i cannot, and i apologize for gaius bothering you at such an odd hour." Her body faltered, but she caught herself on the table. Gaius shook his head.

"How did you know my name?" Gwen asked. Silence fell in the room.


	8. WHAT!

The impact of the ground was becoming very familiar for merlin, Arthur and him had been going against the white knight for longer than he hoped. This creature was obviously created from magic and this battle became more and more out of control every second. Merlin pushed himself up and found Arthur struggling with the magnificent entity, they were both so tired, all they had left was the last spurt of adrenaline. They were losing. He'd lose her and more importantly Camelot would lose the greatest king they'd ever know. Neither were choices he could live with so with a deep breath Merlin did something that in the past he would be too afraid to truly consider.

"MERLIN RUN! GO GET GWAINE AND SAVE KATHRYN!" Arthur yelled trying to keep back the knight, who in turn stabbed him in the arm. Making Merlin with all the force in the world, bring up his hand and throw the knight off with his magic, he called upon the vines around the garden and tied him to the nearest tree. He fell to his knees when completed, Arthur stared at him in shock.

" You have got to be kidding me." Arthur said locking eyes with Merlin. " You could have done that a few minutes to go." he added gathering his sword, Merlin got up and helped Arthur.

"Im sorry."

"For what? Lying to me and having magic? No don't be sorry. It actually makes sense. " Arthur walked away. "Lets go, get Gwaine and save your lady. we shall discuss this matter later."

"That's it?" Merlin stood in awe. Arthur looked over his shoulder "Not now Merlin. Get your priorities straight."


	9. THERE WE GO

Kathryn knew what she had done. She was not sorry. She hoped one day she would be a friend to Guinevere, but with the venom consuming her blood stream she knew she never would get that chance.

" I am sorry. i don't not mean to frighten you." She answered honestly, " Gaius I need my bag. where is it?"

" You did not arrive with one."

"Are you kidding?"

" absolutely not, you arrived just like you are."

"What did they do with it?"

"Why is it important?" Gwen spoke up, Kathryn noticed that Gwen was not one to be tested, she could spot a lie in an instant. She sat down, she could go nowhere, not until the bag was found.

"it is how i survive. How i have been surviving, everything i need is in there." Kathryn explained trying to catch her breath, overtime she turned around it was another problem. They would never understand, they couldn't. However, to her disbelief Gwen sat across from her and took her hands, "I know we could not understand, but please let Gaius help you." the warmth and kinds in the future queen was calming, and comfort was something Kathryn would love to get use to. Tears appeared annoyingly in her eyes, "please atleast wait for Merlin and Arthur to return." Gaius inferred.

"Where did they go?" Gwen asked, not taking her eyes off if Kathryn.

"they went to retrieve a remedy."

"Why would they do that?" Kathryn questioned holding on to her side, the pain was becoming unbearable, she didn't have much longer, maybe dying here would be ok, as long as they wouldn't know she had been here.

"Because you are more important than you think you are apparently." Merlin's voice spoke behind her.


	10. HELLO

She was awake, lucid, and alive. Merlin sighed a bit of relief. They had rushed back so fast, that not one word was spoken. Arthur handed Gaius the petal, who in turn immediately went to work on the remedy. Kathryn didn't take her eyes off of Merlin as she pushed herself up from the table.

"You shouldn't stand." Arthur offered moving toward her to move, but Gaius put his arm up to stop him, "There is no use, she's as stubborn as Merlin." There was a tension in his voice that Merlin rarely heard, he was worried, the question was about what?

"So making yourself at home then?" Merlin scoffed playfully, he knew that Kathryn wouldn't tell anyone what they wanted to hear, she had always been like that. Will and Merlin always had to read the clues she thoughtlessly left when she thought no one was looking. She was frail, so fragile, terrified and so close to death. Freya popped in his head at that moment.

"I'm sorry." She relied looking sympathetic, "I am so sorry Merlin. It isn't easy to lose someone you love." Everyone stared at her, Merlin smiled, she was exactly as he always remembered, knowing what he was thinking. She never quite knew what was going through his mind, but she generally had an idea.

"Why were you giving Gaius such a difficult time?"

"I cannot stay Merlin. If I do it will cause great destruction."

"How so?"

"I cannot say."

"Right," yes, this was classic Kathryn. "Are we going to have to do this the hard way?"

She turned to Arthur, "Where is my bag?" Arthur straightened confused," You don't have it either?" she continued, she rolled her eyes and staggered, Merlin was close enough to catch her. "This is not good Merlin; the venom has almost overtaken my body. It's my fault it's all my fault." Tears flowed from her eyes, she was so weak, he was holding all of her weight in his arms, which wasn't much, and she was so thin. Merlin's heart sank as another tear fell onto his shirt. "Gaius is going to make you better and I will make you safe, eh? Sound like a good plan?"

"I wish Will was here." She pleaded looking in his eyes. Merlin's heart exploded. How could he tell her that he brother was gone?


	11. REALLY?

Arthur shifted uncomfortably and looked over at Guinevere, who was reacted very much the same. Arthur never fully got over the guilt and betrayal of Will and his mag…Oh…how stupid could he be? It was Merlin. Merlin? He didn't want to overreact when he found out about his secret, it wasn't a far stretch though, strange occurrence happened more than often with Merlin. Arthur more didn't want to believe it because Merlin was such a good friend, that he couldn't imagine his father killing him, especially after knowing that he repeatedly saved his life. They would be having a talk when the time came, so many questions burned inside his soul, but that would have to wait till we got an outcome of this situation. How do you tell someone their sibling was dead? He would be devastated if he found out Morgana was gone, even though she did want him dead, there had to be more to that.

"Don't be sad Merlin," Kathryn continued taking his face in her hand, " I might just meet with him again soon." That smile, her sweet innocent smile. Arthur watched in pain as Merlin sat her down in the chair and got to his knees in front of her, he took her hands in his and took a deep breath.

"Kate, I don't know how to tell you this," MErlin began looking back desperately at Arthur, who wanted to help, but had no possible idea as to how. Gwen moved over to him with tears welling up in her eyes, even Gaius took a moment from tension in the room was so incredibly strong that breathing was difficult, everyone seemed to be breathing together.

"Don't," Kathryn pleaded taking in a sharp pain and clutched her stomach. "Oh Kathryn." Merlin wailed pulling her hair from her face. Gaius set back to work, and Gwen took Arthur's hand, which he took great comfort in, he hadn't really lost any of his friends or family, the closest was Morgana, but she was still alive, and his mother who he never knew. To see Merlin who fought for everyone and everything, he had lost his best friend who had sacrificed himself for the love of MErlin, to see him in pain, made Arthur hurt. He stepped forward as he said " Kathryn, Will died giving his life to protect me." She looked at him with a confused look, he looked down " I am so sorry."

"Yes." She replied as everyone looked to her, but she did not stop looking at Arthur, " I am well aware of that. Gaius, is it near completion? The pain is beginning to become unbearable."

" How did you know?" Arthur asked, she smiled again, which Arthur found most impressive, "i was there." she replied. Merlin stood and picked her up and headed toward his bedroom, " Give us a moment will you."

SLAM! the door was closed. The three of them looked at one another, "well," Gwen began, " I don't remember seeing her there."

"Nor do i." Arthur agreed. Gaius lit a flame and pretended not to listen to everything going on.


	12. secret

She expected some sort of reaction, but being thrown into Merlin's room was not exactly the way she pictured it. " Rude." she warned as she stumbled in, Merlin remained faced to the door. The energy coming off his body was strong, it made her nervous to move forward, but that never stopped her before and his temper tantrum wasn't going to either. "Stop being mad at me." she continued taking a step forward, he didn't say anything in response, not even a large sigh. This was taking up time she didn't have, but what she remembered of her dear friend was that he took his time with his emotion, so she took residence on the edge of his bed as she waited.

Several minutes passed, they were getting nowhere, "ok, this is ridiculous why are you mad at me? There is no reason for it, yes i knew that Will was dead, huge shock! Can we please be done with this now?" her words exploded.

"You have a lot to explain." Merlin barely whispered, he turned and looked at her, his eyes were full of a limitless amount of questions. "How did you know about Will?" he continued as he came over and sat next to her.

" after ten years that is the first question you want to ask me?"

" i have so many but something tells me that question will make everything makes sense." He hadn't changed very much, but he had grown so wise, and it was only the beginning of his destiny. His eyes, no one had eyes like him, she always thought of them as two deep storms, they were the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen, and it was so easy to get lost in them. " we don't have time to talk about it right now Merlin." HE stood and began pacing.

"No no no, there are too many questions and no answers, we have to get some answers, how did you know about will? what do you mean you were there? what is so important in the bag? why do you have to leave? Who is they? How are you ALIVE?" All questions that were not so easy to answer, but the truth is Merlin was right, all of the others would make a little more sense if she just told him her secret. "It is only fair," she began, "to tell you my secret since i already know yours." he was breathing hard, trying to compose himself for the answer as if he already knew. He already knew.


	13. HAPPINESS AND SORROW

He stood and waited for her response, he knew that whatever she was going to say was extremely difficult, so he allotted as much time that she wanted. The truth was he desperately wanted to throw his arms around her and comfort her, get her the antidote and make her well, but he knew that she wouldn't take it unless she fully trusted that she was safe, it was his job to make her so. " I…" she began looking at him hoping that he would say what she was thinking. " Go ahead," he said as he kneeled in front of her and took her hands in his " whatever you have to say I am here for you." she chuckled through her tears. "Merlin, you know. I know you do you just for some reason haven't put it together. I knew I was different when i was very young. I knew of things about to happen, huge storms and the rogue fire. The death of my grandfather, I knew all of it before it happened." the beginning of the explanation did make sense, she was always there to stop him from doing things, to protect him from harm. " It began with dreams, but eventually moved to visions in my head, flashes of you will, then i would just know something. The pain was never so bad, but it was something i had to get use to. It was the emotion that came with it, that sometimes becomes unbearable." Merlin wasn't sure what he would feel once he heard the truth and he was slightly shocked by the happiness and excitement that hit him like lightning, he grabbed her and held her close. "You are magic." he whispered in her ear, she had hugged him back, but suddenly her body went limp. NO! "GAIUS!"


	14. ONE CHANCE

Gwen was the last one into the room after Merlin's yell burst through the door, and the sight was close to what she imagined, but not what she hoped for. Kathryn lay there, her eyes closed, tears stained her cheeks, she was motionless, she was….dead.

Merlin was a fit as he stood above her, trying to wake her up, the sadness expressed from his body made Gwen shake. She had to be strong for her friend, this wasn't fair.

Arthur grabbed Merlin from Kathryn as Gaius began examining her, he held his crying servant in his arms, Gwen felt a smile come across her face as she remembered how they both started. The day they met when Merlin stood up to the prince not knowing who he was and ever since then Arthur had changed for the better, the arrogance was gone for the most part, but he when he slipped he took the critique with grace.

Gaius was feverishly trying to help the poor girl while they all stood in shock, Gwen alerted herself, "what do you need Gaius?" she asked moving closer. He shook his head in response and placed his ear upon her chest, a few moments passed, "Gwen come, come." He urged her forward and motioned to the other side of the bed. "Get her head up, and hold it there will you." Gwen did as she was told, she climbed on the bed and held the beautiful girl in her arms, she had a glow about her even at that moment, and she must be wonderful to have something so interesting about her.

Merlin was watching with hope flooding his eyes, but Gwen could tell that he was trying to not get overly excited on whether she was gone or not, Arthur seemed just as anxious, what did he want from this girl? "Will she be ok?" Arthur asked using his brave voice, something he desperately needed to work on for when he became king. Gaius pulled a small vial with a mist of rainbow colors swirling inside from his robes and tilted Kathryn's head back just slightly. Her small gray lips parted and he poured the liquid slowly, "This will take some time," he began "since she is unable to swallow we have to be careful that we don't drown her."

"So…." Merlin began trying to breathe, "She is still alive?" Gaius stayed on task but responded with care in his voice. "Only Just Merlin, she is barely alive."

"Barely is the same as if she were dancing."

"I do hope this works, but Merlin it may have been too late."

"You don't know Kathryn."

"No I don't, but with the faith you have in her I believe this will do what it needs to, just may take a little longer." Gaius explained as he finished administering the last of the medicine, "she needs to rest, let's lay her down." Gwen helped resituate her body on the bed, she looked so peaceful, gentle, but someone who had been through so much, more than she could ever comprehend.

They all started making their way out of the room, all except Merlin who sat next to the bed, took Kathryn's hand and stared intensely at her. Gwen closed the door behind her as she was the last one out, Arthur grabbed her and kissed her right then, it had to have been the greatest kiss she had ever had, he gave everything to her and she reciprocated, it was as if it could be the last. When they separated Arthur whispered into her ear "I would be destroyed if that were you."


	15. WAKE UP

Merlin didn't leave the room for many days, not that he really noticed except to close the window to keep the sunlight out. Kathryn seemed to be doing better, the farloopis flower was doing its job properly or so it seemed since her bruises and cuts were gone and the color underneath the grey exterior was emerging.

None of this made merlin feel much better even though all of this was wonderful, but Gaius believed that she should already have been awake, which of course was not a comfort to Merlin and set him off again.

It seemed that when everything was looking up, another issue would sneak up and knock Merlin in the face. He searched for a magical way to speed up the process, since sitting and waiting was not the easiest thing to do. To do nothing was…..nothing. Gaius made him promise to see what the antidote's outcome would be, he hated that.

He sat on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands, a position he found himself in a lot. He hadn't slept of had anything to eat since he saw Kathryn lying on the table. His eyes burned from the lack of tears that he had run out of. She had to wake up, now would be preferable.


	16. WILL

Kathryn knew it was a dream, but it was so perfect that she couldn't bear to let herself wake. the world was so bright, every color was richer and more vibrant, and every sound was music to her ears.

She wore a stunningly white dress, her dark hair laid in deep waves down her back. As she walked out of her home, well she figured it was hers although she could not recall ever being there before, she was met with a glorious sight, a large farm with cows and sheep as far as she could see. There was a small pond on her right with a group of small ducks swimming in a circle, and to her left were hills full of wildflowers in every color she had ever seen in her life. The air smelled of jasmine and happiness making her smile into the sun that glittered her face.

Suddenly she felt two arms wrap around her waist and she felt herself being thrown into the air and rotated back into the arms of her brother. She grabbed his face in disbelief and brought him into a very tight embrace, it could have been heaven, but she knew better.

"Hello Will."

"Hello my Kate, what shall we do today?" his face was lit up with excitement, just like when they were kids.

" Oh I don't know."

"Then, i say we have a picnic." he offered as he made his way behind her and pointed to the mountains, "Right there." Not a second later she felt herself lurch and arrive to the spot he chose, with quite a feast laying before them.

"It's beautiful." she whispered as she sat down, her dress flowed perfectly all around her, like a princess. Will, beautiful will with the sky blue eyes and a smile that flew like birds, sat across from her " It's been a while my little star since we have been able to speak."

"i know, " the pain from their loss was evident on their faces. "I wish this were real."

" it is if you believe it is."

" no, its the dragon venom affect."

"Dragon venom? what would you know about it?"

"Its a long story."

"It's a lot of food." she smiled at his answer while grabbing the loveliest strawberry she could ever imagine, "Where shall i begin?" His face grew dim at her question and looked down at his hands, "Start at the beginning, start on the night you screamed in the woods." his option wasn't very shocking to her, that was exactly what she should have expected. "well, I will start at the beginning, but that night isn't it, exactly."


	17. BLACK PANTHER

As soon as she pictured it, she and Will were witnessing it. Kathryn was seeing a ten year version of herself in the woods gathering wood. It was daylight, but everything was colored many versions of grey.

"This is the beginning?" Will asked beside her, she nodded in response for if she dare spoke every emotion she remembered of what had happened, what would happen, would take her over completely. She turned waiting for it, Will copied her movement, and he took her hand in panic as a black panther ran at them. Kathryn held them there as it ran threw them to the younger Kathryn, who stood in awe as the panther stopped two inches from her. Will was trying not to panic as she looked between Kathryn and the younger version of his sister,

"This isn't the moment to worry." Kathryn spoke in a voice so steady that she scarcely believed it. The younger version of her spoke softly to the panther, and began to pet it slowly. " Thats incredible." Will emoted flabbergasted, "Don't sound so surprised, it is me." she joked elbowing him in the ribs.

Angry voices grew in the distance, Kathryn felt her lungs collapse, she closed her eyes trying to prepare herself.

"WHERE IS IT? FIND IT!" a man's voice pierced the air which made the young girl alert of what the panther was and that she needed to protect it. She waved her hand over the beast and muttered something that made the massive black animal disappear. Will turned shocked " You have magic!" his voice cracked.


	18. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

"Why didn't you tell me?" Will judged looking passed her to the voices, Kathryn felt a giggle jolt her body, the first person she ever told was Merlin, and that was just before she awoke to this world.

Before she could give him a reason for her secrets, a rush of half a dozen men appeared scavenging for the animal. A tall skeleton like man, with dark hair that showed the beginning of frost covering the front of his temple, eyed the young Kathryn. The witch finder she whispered to herself aware of the future she would have with him. Will shifted as the man got incredibly close to his young sister. Kathryn took his arm and spoke gently, trying to relax her protective loving brother, "Don't worry." She herself was having a difficult time relaxing; she never wanted to relive her past, never something she thought about doing, but now she didn't have much of a choice. Go with the wind, always changing and never the same, her way of life, another day to survive.

Could she survive? Is she surviving? Is she already dead? Now she had all the questions and no answer, which is frustrating.

"Hello there little girl. " the snake like voice spoke, but young Kathryn was unafraid and gave a sweet smile, he continued "have you seen a large black animal come around here?" he asked making Kathryn's spine tingle, she hated his fake voice, he constantly used it and unbeknownst to Kathryn they believed him a mighty portion of the time. She felt a growl come up from her belly as the witch finder kept smiling, but the past version of her was quite impressive.

"I don't believe I have." She answered softly and so honestly, if Kathryn hadn't been a witness or previously lived it, she would have believed her. She never broke eye contact with the older man, she knew that she had to protect the creature from the cruel treatments of the fearful man. Pride resinated from Will as he watched the scene progress. The witch finder did not fully believe what he was being told, he knew the panther came this way, and he also knew that if the child had seen it, she would not be so calm.

Frustrated by the lack of evidence and the need to continue the scavenger he moved on, but both Kathryn' knew that was not the last time they would see him in the next twenty four hours.

"What happens next?" Will whispered excitedly, " You were so brave. Did the Panther leave?" It was fascinating to see her brother so…fascinated.

" Wait for the proper moment, and you will see. I had to make sure that they were all gone before i did…..this." young Kathryn spoke a few words and a young girl around her age appeared where the panther disappeared.

Kathryn felt the tears trickled down her face as she the name of the girl escaped her. "Freya."


	19. SHE SAID?

He was frozen, he had to have dreamed it, but why would he have invented Kathryn saying Freya's name? How would…? He sat next to her and shook her gently. "Kathryn, Kathryn….Please….wake up. How do you know Freya?"

She didn't move. He felt his chest trying to hold his heart, but it kept trying to explode out.

"Merlin!" Gaius called from the other room, it jolted him and gave him a reason to forget what he just heard, Frey…ugh….Kathryn needed to get up soon. More questions. This was becoming more frustrating,

As he emerged from his room, he found Gaius standing at the table with a small feast of meats and vegetables. "You haven't eaten in three days."

"Im not hungry."

"That has nothing to do with it, you will make yourself sick and when Kathryn wakes up she will need you at your best." Gaius had his father voice and MErlin knew that he wasn't going to get away easily, and more importantly he was to preoccupied and tried to put up a fight. So he sat and began eating the vegetables. Gaius patted his back in the comforting way he appreciated and sat across him. " That was a lot easier than i anticipated."

Merlin continued to force the food down his throat as he grew more nauseous with every bite, but still he continued knowing Gaius was right, he needed to eat. Gaius kept staring at him, waiting for something. He shrugged as he continued to eat.

"She will be fine Merlin, she will wake up and we will figure all of this out." The surety in his voice did make Merlin feel a little better, but overtime there were more complications and not any solutions. What did Freya have to do with any of this? Oh Freya. Merlin closed his eyes and pictured her soft lovely face, he thought about her at least once a day, then threw her from his mind before he'd collapse from heartache. Would she come back from the dead too?


	20. HEAD PAIN

Kathryn felt a shake deep in her soul, and heard her name from a distant voice.

"That was Merlin." Will's voice was so sorrowful, Kathryn wasn't completely sure why. "You should go to him Kate, he needs you."

"How do I go to him? I'm…."

"You are not dead. This is not the end for you." A spark of anger appeared at the pit of her stomach and began to grow. This was not fair. None of it. Bringing her brother back to her and Freya, she wanted it all to end; she wanted to be away from the pain. "Merlin needs you; this is your time to shine my star."

"Don't call me that." She never meant it when she said it, she loved being his star, but she also never felt like she deserved such a compliment, "There is still so much to be remembered."

"You remember it all; this is everything you need to tell Merlin and so much more, it's important." With a roll of her eyes she shook her head in agreement "Stop keeping so many secrets and tell them what they all need to know." He took her by the shoulders "I know you've been keeping everything in for so long and you don't trust many people, but the one person you can trust more than anyone is Merlin."

"Is that why you gave your life up for a prince?"

"He wasn't such a bad guy." He said with his half smile that matched her perfectly, "besides I had to protect Merlin who we both know you're in love with."

"I am not" she slapped him on the arm. He rebuked by grabbing her waist and rolling her to the ground. The world around them was frozen, paused, waiting to be continued, but she was with her brother her sweet protective annoying brother.

"Didn't you plan your wedding with him when you were seven?" He began tickling her, she was only ticklish in one spot in her body. Her left knee, and only three people knew where it was. Two were dead. She started spasming as she tried to get away, her laughter was putting her in a fit and her side started to hurt.

"Alright I give!" She yelled as she jolted and hit his head with hers, but when she looked up she found Merlin's head laying in her lap. A red bump was forming just above his right eye.

"Are you alright?" she exclaimed grabbing his face to take a better look, he closed his eyes and touched her hand, "now that you're awake, yes." When he opened his eyes he looked straight into hers, her heart raced and she thought of her brother, always making fun of her for they bashful way she would get around Merlin. Not the time.

"How are you feeling? You were jolting around we thought you may hurt yourself." Gaius voice sounded off to her left as he came closer to examine her, she felt amazing, her body was spry once again. She began laughing remembering her brother, knowing that she would see him again, "That was because Will was tickling me." She giggled looking at Merlin who shared in the memories and gave a smile of remembrance. "Gaius I am so sorry for the way I acted."

"Nonsense my dear, you were concerned for the good of the kingdom. I cannot argue with that." He touched her head above her left eye, it felt bruised. "You two hit hard."

She hadn't even noticed but if her looked like Merlin's it was pretty bad, but compared to the pain she had before she went into her own world, it was nothing. Her stomach growled, " I am hungry."


	21. SOUP

It was good to see Merlin eating properly, Gaius was concerned of how his young man would react if Kathryn had never reawaken, he probably would have lost him. The two young people didn't speak much, but they carefully kept an eye on one another. He tried to give them their space, but there was something about the scene that reminded him of his Alice, so he felt compelled to stay near.

"You look tired." Kathryn finally spoke as she moved her bowl of soup away and rubbed her forehead. Merlin looked further down into his bowl; Gaius thought that he would drown himself if he bent just a little farther. "Did you find my bag?" she asked sensing the discomfort Merlin was in and wanting to change the subject. It was so interesting to watch the two of them together; when he moved, she moved, they were like two rain drops dancing in the wind, and there was an unspoken connection between them that created a flow of energy through the room.

"We did, but it was empty." He whispered waiting for her to over react, even Gaius knew that is what her response would be, but she just shrugged, "Well alright then. Not the best thing to happen, but that gives me a clue as to who is doing all of this."

"All of what?"

"Merlin I have a lot to tell you."

"Yes I know."

"So when I do, I don't want what you think of me to be different, but then again I am not exactly who I use to be."

"Neither am I." they laughed and stood, took a look at Gaius and ventured into Merlin's room. They needed their time together. To catch up. Kathryn wasn't very trusting, but whatever information she had she was going to tell Merlin, and what she knew was vital to the survival of Camelot.


	22. ALONE

They were alone, really alone, just the two of them. Kathryn rushed him and gave him a hug like never before; it took Merlin by surprise, an excellent surprise. "Hello" she whispered in his ear, he squeezed her gently and buried his nose in her hair, it smelled of wild flowers and sunshine. "Hello black star." She pulled away and smiled up at him, she was always that much shorter than him, not matter how tall he grew she was always about six inches below him.

"I haven't been called that in a long time." she took his and hopped gracefully on the bed, just like a feather, he followed with a more clumsy approach. "That's what you were saying when you arrived here, well even barely saying, more breathing it." A flash of the broken girl entered his brain; it was such a change from the stunningly beautiful girl that sat before him. Her eyes sparkled, her voice sounded like the most beautiful song he had ever heard, his friend that he longed missed and thought was dead sat inches away from him. There was a completion that he hadn't felt in such a long time. For that he was thankful. "So what happened? Where have you been? Why didn't you come back?"

"I am so sorry Merlin. I never meant to hurt you, but leaving was the only way to protect my mother, Will…you and your mother. The day I disappeared, I was met in the woods by a witch finder; he was searching for a black panther and was having no luck. Mostly because, I made her invisible." Merlin's entire body lurched in shock, "Freya." When he mentioned her name, Kathryn mirrored his reaction. "You know Freya?" she asked breathless, Merlin shook his head, he didn't want to think about it, but he had to share with Kathryn if she was going to share with him.

"A few years ago, she was captured by a man who was going to get money to imprison her." He began slowly hoping this once that she would see it all and know everything, but she sat urging him to continue with fear in her eyes. "I helped her escape, I hid her beneath the castle," he felt ashamed for what he was about to say and a little unsure why. "We were going to runaway and live free from Camelot, just the two of us, but she was killed the night we were going to leave." Kathryn closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh, "The curse, I was trying to get a remedy, but she disappeared."

"You spent all of that time with her?"

"When the witch finder finally left me alone in the woods, I lowered the invisible veil around Freya; she told me that she had been running from them for a few days. She had no clue as to where she was, hadn't had any food or water, I had to help her. She has…had such kind eyes and a sweet smile. I can understand why you fell for her." She added the last part meekly and looked down at her free hand, "So I returned home grabbed some belongings and food for our journey."

"You were just going to leave?"

"She needed me."

"You didn't tell anyone!"

"I couldn't."

"You could have told me!" He was trying not to be angry, she had done everything that he had, but why not tell him? He would have come, he could have helped she didn't have to be alone.

"If I had told you Merlin, you would have wanted to come with me, and your destiny is much too great and important to have you not go on your own journey." He didn't completely like her answer, but he couldn't tell her she was wrong. The look on her face gave the impression that she knew better than him any way. "When I arrived that night back to Freya, I knew we had to be careful because the witch finder could be around, but I was unprepared for so many of them to charge at us all at once. I screamed, but the witch finder placed a spell on the both of us to shield you from us. I was there, I saw you and Will looking for me, I was so thankful that you didn't use any of your powers to search for me because that is what I expected."

"Not with Will right there, he didn't know yet. I waited til much later to come out and look for you with magic, but obviously I didn't find you." He always knew that he had failed; he just didn't realize how much, she had been right there and he hadn't sensed her.

"They took us a day away to an abandoned palace, it was once the land of King Gwenden, whose kingdom declined after a sickness took more than half of the lives there. He fled with his family to Mandres and was never heard from again. He was one of magic as well, and on the contrary to popular belief it does not pass down to all children, Will and I are an example of that."

"Who did you get your power from?" Merlin had never thought to ask, she shrugged, "I have no idea, and everyone in my family has kept all of that a secret because of Uther and what he would do to me if he ever found out." Merlin wasn't very surprised by her answer, the only reason he found out of his gifts was because they needed his father to defeat the great dragon, "I got mine from my father I guess, he was the last dragon lord, but when he died he passed it on to me."

"You are a dragon lord?"

"Yes, since about two years ago."

"I thought your father died when you were very young,"

"So did I, but Gaius helped him escape."

"Well, he seems rather useful."

"He is the greatest, but who are you hiding from now? As far as I know the witch finder is dead." Kathryn's eyes bulged with excitement, "Really? Is that true?" Merlin nodded, " Oh thank the heaven's, not that I wish death upon someone, but that is one person I am free of."

"Who is the other?"

Kathryn stood and made her way angelically to the window to meet the sun, everything she did was so poetic, how could anyone think she was anything but pure magic?

"What do you say Merlin, would you like to venture outside for a bit?" She turned and tapped his shoulder, "YOUR IT!" and like lightning she ran out of the room, Merlin followed her with glee.


	23. UNEXPECTED

She flew through the castle, not positive of her surroundings, but knew if she was going toward a location she had no right to be in, Merlin would giver her a warning.

It felt good to fun, the minerals within the Farloopis flower healed every injury she ever had, it made her wonder if her scar had disappeared. She hadn't had much time to check.

There was a sense of freedom now as she rushed down the front staircase of the castle. It was an amazing sight to behold, which earned her the mistake to slowdown and letting Merlin speed past her.

"You're it." He yelled. They ran and played until they reached the woods, not caring about what anyone thought on the way. Kathryn could have just kept on running, an idea she ached to think about before, but it really was a different feeling.

She knew she need to break to rejuvenate herself, she paused at the pond that shown in the sunlight. How interesting it was to her, shadows conjured all around, but broke where the water began allowing the sun to illuminate the surroundings in a dark orange light.

Merlin put his arm around her shoulders, she was shocked by the lack of reaction by her part knowing full well that if it had been anyone else her guard would be up.

"Thank you." She said just then realizing that the hadn't spoken much since they left Camelot's walls, but that they laughed and enjoyed each other, he smiled his charming smile "I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Better than i can remember, except for my feet." She glanced down and noticed her hands and arms, every cut and scar had been replaced by new skin, her feet she assumed had been the same. She spent most of her life running away with nothing to protect her feet, but all the wear her feet once had was gone, so she took a step in the cool clear water to sooth the agitation. She lifted the bottom of her dress…her dress…this was not the dress she arrived in but a…new dress.

"Where did this come from?" she inquired examining the intricate stitching.

"Gwen made it for you, couldn't keep you in the other one could we?" he took a sullen pause remembering the state she had been in, it made her uncomfortable, but so nice to be cared for.

"I suppose not." She smiled trying to bring forth the happier Merlin. "So my good friend" she continued, "what shall we do today?" Merlin gave her the, you know we have some more to discuss look, but she didn't want to. "I want to just have a moment to not think about the past or the future, I want to live in the moment, be present. I have spent ten years running away and before I have to continue I just want to be here, with you." She didn't mean to start crying, but happiness spread over her body and overflowed.

"I understand," Merlin began, "And to be completely honest I was hoping you would say something to that effect, but you were so urgent to get away from here before, I thought you'd want to…I would love to spend the whole day to be with you, I have missed you."

"I'm sorry." She was sorry, it hurt her to think about the pain and anguish she had witnessed when she was captured by Aredian, the witch finder. Merlin walked out into the water to her and took her hand, "It wasn't your fault Kathryn, and you did what you know that you could live with."

"How can you be so understanding?"

"Because I have had to make decisions that others wouldn't understand to protect Camelot and Arthur, choices I had to make, whether I wanted to or not." She loved his honesty, there was nothing about Merlin that she didn't respect and care for, he was her best friend that kindred spirit that comes only once in life. She wrapped her arms around his waist, and he took her in his arms once more, the perfect fit.

It was as if time stood still and Merlin could hold her forever, but being the spontaneous creature Kathryn is, she pushed him down into the water while letting out a birdlike laugh. Immediately he began to splash her, creating a massive battle between them, the splashing became wrestling, he dunked her, and she dunked him. Finally, the laughter was so intense they just fell into each others arms and sat in the pond, she was stunning, the flush in her cheeks the lightness in her eyes, as if her life hadn't been full of fear and torment. The light blue dress Gwen made silhouetted her body brilliantly. Merlin had to keep remembering this was his childhood friend, and Will's sister, but then he got confused because he wasn't sure why he had to keep reminding himself.

As the sun began to fall and the world began to chill they decided to head back to the castle. Until Kathryn stopped.

"Are you alright?" he loved her face when she was thinking, her brow scrunched together and pursed her lips. She rung her hands together as she spoke carefully, "I don't want to go back yet, I don't want to face everyone."

"If we don't they may come looking for us."

"I know, but Merlin…." She stopped, he knew that she was in a dilemma. "Maybe I shouldn't go back." His heart dropped. "What do you mean?"

"This may have all been a bad idea. Going and running through Camelot like that, where everyone saw me." She began to breath hard and holding her heart, "What if they all die because I played a game with you?"

"Who?"

"I don't know." He took a deep breath and took her shoulders, "You do not need to worry, what happened to my friend who was so happy and carefree."

"Must have been the Farloopis Flower."

"I don't believe that," he truly didn't, she wanted to be happy to be free. "maybe the only way to be free is to stay and let me help you, because I will do everything in my power to make you safe." She smiled again, that intoxicating smile, then reached up and kissed on the cheek; he felt it all over his body. "I trust you Merlin."

"I love you." He replied.


	24. WINDOW

The night was growing upon him as he stood by his bedroom window; he had spotted Merlin running merrily away with Kathryn down the stairs of the castle. Hours had passed since then and he tried to ignore the heavy itch in his gut that made him more than uneasy. Merlin wouldn't have just left, but there was something that made Arthur believe that their relationship may soon splinter off.

"Arthur?" Gwen's voice called meekly behind him, he looked back relieved to see her, she smiled, her perfect calming smile, "Are you alright?" she looked about the room and shook her head, Arthur had no real excuse for the state of his room, he tried to keep it tidy, but Merlin knew where everything belonged.

"I see that Kathryn has regained consciousness." Changing the subject, he wasn't sure how he was, he felt numb except for that nagging burn in his stomach.

"Yes I noticed that as well, she seemed happy….as did Merlin."

"Which was a bit strange was it not?"

"A bit I suppose since she was so particular about no one seeing her, then running about freely. It could have just been the dragon venom making her say that. Gaius did say that it causes heightened perceptions and hysteria." She paused biting her lips, "I am happy for them though they seemed so…completed….familiar with one another." Arthur gave an agreeable nod, he wanted to meet this girl, understand her and discover once and for all if she did indeed know something that influenced the kingdom.

"Clouds are rolling in, the wind is changing, will you require more blankets?" Oh his loving Gwen, she shifted from lover mode to servant mode so quickly, "I will be fine." He never wanted her to do anything for him,

Rain began to beat on the glass, every drop counted towards time running out; if they did not return by morning he would have to send his men out in search for them, the idea made him cringe. He feared his father's reaction, she was made of magic, Arthur was positive of that fact, but he had kept that specific detail from the king. A decision that was much easier to do now that he new Merlin's secret, it was difficult to wrap his mind around. He was so angry, angry that Merlin hadn't trusted him enough to tell him, then anger turned to fear, the deep fear of losing his friend, but when he looked into the terrified eyes of Merlin in that forest, pinning that white knight to the tree, he felt proud. No telling how many times Merlin had saved his life without him being aware, and the precautions Merlin had to not get caught, Arthur had to give him credit for the amount of bravery there was in that little body.

As the rain fell hard, everyone in town had made it to some sort of shelter indoors, all except two figures holding hands and running to the staircase. "Well, I guess we won't have to wait much longer to meet her." Gwen smiled taking his arm and led him out of the room, she was a bit giddy, that Arthur could not comply with; he struggled with the feeling that crept on him when he was … going to battle.


	25. TRUTH BEGINS

The origin of Gwen's excitement was unclear, but she could barely contain it. Leading Arthur through the corridors she gained speed with every step, Arthur kept swiftly with her, but she could feel his resistance.

"I'm sure she is brilliant." She encouraged looking back with a large smile, "I know it sounds mad but I trust her."

"You trust Merlin."

"As do you." Gwen knew of their friendship, she had a feeling from the very beginning that they would be great confidants to one another; repeatedly she had seen them bring out the most amazing qualities in the other. She definitely knew that Merlin had most of the credit for the man she fell so in love with that she pulled into Gaius's quarters. The door was already open as Merlin and Kathryn had only just arrived seconds before them, they were laughing so hard Gwen thought their heads may pop.

She couldn't help but smile at their happiness, Kathryn was so different than the girl she had encountered days before, he was so full of life and seemed to not have a care in the world, but she had secrets, that was still relevant. Kathryn spotted them first and swiftly switched to a proper stance, her silver eyes shown "Hello" she bowed.

Gwen laughed as she looked at Arthur who seemed very uncomfortable at the respect, "hello Kathryn, I see you have kept Merlin from doing his duties." Merlin quickly went to her side as Kathryn hung her head in shame.

"I am sorry sire, but she just recovered and…" Gwen was not about to let them apologize, "and you wanted to be with your friend, he understands. How are you feeling Kathryn?"

Kathryn perked, somewhat expectantly, and walked up to Gwen. "I am feeling…well…I want to thank you so much for the dress, even though I managed to completely soak it."

"You are more than welcome. Don't worry about the dress, the water won't affect it, can't tell you how many times I've managed to get water all over my clothes, this fabric is invincible."

"It's really beautiful, and incredibly thoughtful."

"What was supposed to be in the bag?" Arthur's voice jolted breaking the lightness of the air, Gwen felt embarrassed and Merlin stiffened, Kathryn smiled, "That is why you will be the greatest King history will ever know."

"How would you know that?"

"Magic" The word flowed through her mouth so easily, Arthur shook his head, "you won't kill me."


	26. THE TALK

It hadn't crossed his mind….how could it NOT have crossed his mind? Merlin was so lost in his happiness that he forgot that she may still be ripped from him if Uther discovered of her abilities.

"I do not know everything, but I can and will help you to keep Camelot safe," she continued, "First though, may I change in to something dry? The cold is increasing becoming unbearable." Gwen shuffled over and took her arm. "Of course you may and I have just the thing." Gwen flashed Merlin a smile that he hadn't seen before, but he liked it and was thankful for Gwen's help, the ladies left the room without a goodbye, leaving Merlin there with Arthur. He knew very well that they were about to have the talk they had been dreading.

He paced nervously around the table waiting to be spoken to, as Arthur stood very still in the corner full of angst, Merlin wasn't sure of what to say, or where to start.

"I gather that she is doing much better. Could even go running in the cold rain." Arthur began, there was a twinge of frustration coming from the root of his throat, Merlin knew that Arthur was not angry with him at all but incredibly confused and upset.

"I apologize that we didn't come immediately to you."

"She seems to be much more willing to provide information. Does she always tell you things without telling you anything?"

"It's how she survives." Arthur sat down at the table, and looked up at Merlin. "Is that how you have been surviving? Telling me things, without telling me." Merlin would never have put it that way, "I haven't been 'surviving' as you believe, and I would have given my life up in a second to save yours and to protect Camelot."

"Why?"

"Because I believe in your destiny, that you will be a great king."

"Kathryn tell you that? Is that why you came?"

"No I thought she was dead, I came because my mother thought it better for me, people in Eiildor were beginning to discover that I had magic and to protect them and my mother I came here. I didn't know how dangerous that would be, but it was the best decision I have ever made, no matter who I lost in the process."

"Who did you lose?" Merlin had the urge to spill everything to his friend, his King, his brother, but the pain was so strong and the fear of everyone's life was keeping him from doing so. Just then Gwen ran in with a pale face.

"she RAN AWAY!"


	27. RUN

Kathryn ran, her instincts kept her fast and quiet. She hoped beyond anything she had ever hoped before that he had not spotted her, especially not when she was with Gwen.

_It was a mistake, I should have just left. _She thought as she reached a lovely lake draped with mountains and hills, she was thankful for the rain, it would cover her tracks. Fresh tears flowed from her eyes as she felt her heart gnaw against her chest, she didn't want to leave, it was safe.

Merlin. Her best friend, she didn't have much in her life, but she knew that he was the one person who was the most important in her life. It was difficult for even her to understand, but whatever decision she made, it always had him in mind. He said he loved her, and he did…just…not they way she wanted him to. Yes he cared about her, but until she resurfaced into his world, he hadn't thought about her, it was not what it seemed.

SNAP! Kathryn looked over her right shoulder and seized breathing; she tiptoed slowly to a large rock next to the water, _it could have been a bird in the tree_, she attempted to persuade herself. _Maybe he didn't even see me, I cannot just abandon them, I didn't have a chance to tell them anything. _

Kathryn was so lost with her internal monologue that she did not notice a group of five men gathering near the water, three of them where the guards that got her into this situation, one she had never seen before and of course Vincent, the man from her nightmares. He wasn't in charge like usual, the unknown man was, this man was evil, it oozed from his body, she could even smell it. Vincent with his dark hair and light eyes stood not two feet from her, _this is it_ she thought as he glanced in her direction.

"This is useless got what we needed." Vincent moaned, she had never seen him give up on anything, especially not in looking for her.

"Silence, what we gathered in the bag was not all we needed. The girl had more."

"Well Ethan, if I know anything about Kathryn she is not one to be caught and if she is, it's intentional. You will not find her." Vincent spoke knowledgeably, it was the closest thing to a compliment that anyone had really said about her, and the fact that it came from the man who hated her more than anyone else she had ever encountered was an unexpected surprise. His statement however, made Ethan's breathing become heavy, full of frustration. "You don't understand if we don't find her, it will mean death for us all, and everyone we have ever met."

"They are really that vengeful?"

"You have no idea what they have in store for Camelot and the fate of everyone who will remain faithful to the thrown." Ethan moved forward leaving the grounds, the three guards followed, leaving Vincent, he looked around fear in his eyes. "Kathryn if you are here…please help. They will need it." He whispered then followed his group. Shock hung in her body making her numb, Vincent, the man who tortured her, followed her, taunted her, and was asking for help? She did not see that coming.

A hand grabbed hers, she choked a scream, turned and came face to face with a girl who was vaguely familiar…she had bright brown eyes and dark stunning hair.

"Hello Kate." She smiled lovingly, Kathryn hugged her with every once of happiness "FREYA! You're…"

"Dead." She responded lightly, Kathryn backed away "so was I."

"You were right, not all magic dies. My curse is still upon me, so my soul is still earthbound, even though my body has expired. The last time I was here, was when I died." Kathryn looked around, _were they coming back_?

"Freya, how did they not see me?"

"I placed a protected field around you, they could not see or hear you."

"Thank you."

"After how many times you rescued me? Nonsense." Freya took a seat on the rock. "We have much to discuss my dear Kathryn. For starters, why did you run away?"

"You know why."

"You think you are protecting them, but you are not. Merlin needs you; he needs your support and your protection. He never thinks about who will do for him because he is too focused on protecting Arthur and the bigger picture. He does not see his importance. Much like you don't see yours." Kathryn felt uneasy, she never thought herself as truly important, she just ran, her life was to try to keep herself safe and who ever she may cross, something she failed to do for Freya. " I am so sorry you were caught." She offered, slowly trying to change the subject just slightly. Freya giggled at her, " you know, when I met Merlin, we he rescued me from my prison, he reminded me so much of you. I couldn't contemplate why he wanted to help me so, but he said it was because he understood."

"You loved him."

"I trusted him, which in your words is 'much greater than love,' you trust him too."

Kathryn did, more than anyone else alive, which frightened her.


	28. RID

"What happened?" Arthur questioned, he had a genuine fear that something like this would happen. Gwen was breathless " we were walking" she began rubbing her right arm tenderly, " we were going to my house, nothing seemed at all amiss until we reached my door, she suddenly became frazzled, threw me inside and ran off."

"Are you alright?"

"Yes I just don't know what caused her to flee." Arthur knew it was her instincts; he wouldn't kill her because she wouldn't be here to do so. He couldn't trust her because she was beyond human; she used people because she didn't trust anyone, not even Merlin.

"Maybe she saw someone, one of the men who captured her perhaps." Merlin offered as he feverishly looked out of his window, the concern that painted his face made Arthur's stomach burn in anger, how could she do this to Merlin? He would find her and when he did he would rid her from the world.

Merlin scrambled to get materials to follow her, he trusted her, Gwen trusted her.

"Maybe she fled to protect us." Gwen began, "that's what she kept repeating when she was infected with the dragon venom, that her being her was wrong and she had to leave."

"Have you realized that she has told us nothing?" Arthur tried to manage his tone, but his anger came out anyway, Merlin looked as he had just been slapped in the face and you would have thought Gwen had lost her best friend. However, neither of them could deny his statement. "We will find her and get the answers we require to keep Camelot safe."

He walked out before he finished the sentence, his brain stretched in confliction, he wanted to trust her, but for what purpose, how had she proved any loyalty? It wasn't like Morgana who he had known throughout childhood, who had supported him, guided him and even she was not to be trusted.


	29. RESCUE

Merlin and Gwen mirrored one another, blank stares spread across their faces, and the next step was unclear. At least for Gwen, was she to follow Arthur or was she to stay with Merlin, both needed her; her guidance, her ear, her help, although she assumed that she could not be too much of any of the previous, to either of them in this case.

Her heart hung low, she trusted Kathryn much like she always trusted Merlin. They both possessed a bravery that burned deep into their souls. Arthur didn't see it fully, he couldn't even if he wanted to, he had to remain blinded to appease his father; a fact that always sparked rage with her. Arthur was more of a man and king that his father could ever dream about being.

"I have to go after her." Merlin's voice interrupted the silence with his determined voice and rush to his bedroom, "Which direction did she go Gwen?" he questioned over his self made racket.

"I am not quite sure, towards the lake perhaps." Gwen guessed, "Aren't you going to wait for Arthur?" Merlin slowly made his way out of his room with a large leather-bound book and a bag so stuff the seams stretched. "I cant Gwen, he doesn't trust Kathryn, ever since Morgana he makes rash decisions, whatever he plans to do when he finds her isn't good."

"Arthur would never do something horrible to someone; he knows there is always another way."

"For Camelot, for you, he would, he'd have to and I understand that, it's the most logical thing to do, but…Kathryn…" Gwen's heart ached when he spoke her name, the fear held deep in his eyes shown through. "You love her." it was surprising to see Merlin in love for some unknown reason, he never had anyone before.

"I trust her. She can help us, we can learn from her experience and gifts." His denial for his feelings were not convincing in the slightest, but Gwen knew that pushing was a waste of energy and time, so the only thing she could do was grab his hand to console him, just for a moment. He was so much like Arthur, the care and the loyalty to Camelot and to people they cared about, but Arthur was able to love and so was Merlin if he allowed himself.

"You love her Merlin, I know you do. The look in your eyes is very much like Arthur's when I was to be burned at the stake." He took in what she said and his eyes shifted between her and the door, his smile warmed the room, he squeezed her hand in return "Cover for me Gwen," he kissed her forehead and darted out of the room.

Gwen stood contemplating how exactly she was going to do that.


	30. DEPART

"It is impossible to believe Vincent request my aid," Kathryn stated making her way back through the forest.

"He wasn't asking for you to help him, but to help Camelot." Freya noted from her right side, her company was sincerely missed and created a bigger hole in Kathryn's hard exterior.

"I don't see why he would waste his time."

"Maybe he doesn't trust those he is working for." Freya's answer forced a grin from Kathryn, she was usually the one answering questions such as these and now she was the one asking…wait…she hadn't had a vision since she awoke from her unforgettable dream…she hadn't put a barrier up herself…hadn't even crossed her mind. _Curious…why wouldn't I? _ Kathryn looked back to her right and noticed Freya had disappeared, she turned to see her friend was standing very still, as if she could not continue forward.

"You cannot come with me can you?"

"No I must remain here. Please stop questioning everything Kate, go with what you know, you will not be too surprised with what you find."

"You enjoy this don't you?"

"Absolutely."

"Why don't you just tell me what you know?" Freya's shoulders slumped and gave her a _you didn't just really ask that did you _expression, "You know that I don't know what you need to know." She did, there was a fine line on what someone should know and what could destroy what was suppose to happen, foresight was very sensitive, and sometimes it was much better to not know what your future and past held. "Don't be afraid like I was Kathryn, there is so much more to life than fear."

"Your fear was understandable, you didn't want to hurt anyone."

"Didn't stop me from doing just that."

"You never hurt me."

"No." Kathryn held her swiftly as they both cried.


	31. HOLE

Merlin was utterly shocked to find his master in the stables waiting for him, with his arms crossed and a glare that could make a knight weaken.

"Coming to muck out the stables I would presume…" Merlin looked at his feet and let out a deep regrettable sigh, "you of course" Arthur continued, "are my manservant and friend, so you wouldn't be sneaking off and leaving me here to fetch my own horse for tomorrow would you?" Merlin had no answer to give since Arthur was one step ahead of him for the first time…ever.

"I will not lie to you Merlin, I am disappointed."

"For what?" the sharp tone was not entirely meant to be spoken, but Merlin's desire to have Kathryn with him and safe was too great, and having Arthur be 'disappointed' for the act of justice was a bit much for him.

"Going behind my back."

"What about you? Pay close attention to what you are doing…you are going to capture and murder a girl who has done nothing to you, expect help save your life. She begged to leave to protect everyone but no one wanted her to leave, she was broken, BROKEN and still giving us information…"

"I don't want to kill her."

"You don't trust her."

"She showed up out of nowhere."

"You found her!"

"I didn't know she had magic!"

"What's wrong with people who have magic?"

"They can't be trusted." Merlin punched Arthur in the face, knocking him to the floor; tears flowed from his raging eyes. He spoke no words as he grabbed his horse and fled.

"MERLIN!" Arthur screamed behind him in his cloud of dust, but he continued rapidly wanting so badly to make time go backwards just a few minutes. Why had he done that? Did Arthur really not trust him? What would happen if he did find Kathryn? Never return to his home? His conflicts made him feel split into two pieces and in place of his heart where a gaping hole that felt that it could never be mended not matter what choice was to be made.


	32. SWINGING HAS COMMENCED

It didn't take long for Arthur to meet up with Merlin. "MERLIN! STOP!" he screamed rushing on Merlin's left side, but Merlin kept on, keeping his eyes forward and his ears ringing with hope for a sign from Kathryn. MERLIN I ORDER YOU TO STOP!" Arthur continued trying to grab Merlin's reins, who in response elbowed his prince to get free, "MERLIN!"

"ARTHUR LEAVE ME ALONE!" Merlin finally shouted back, and then quickly receiving a sharp kick in the face, he felt his body flip back and fall hard in the cold hard earth. He looked up and watched Miliani his vivacious horse run away. Arthur jumped down and grabbed Merlin and turned him on his back, Merlin started immediately swinging his arms, the slaps commenced."Merlin, please…stop!" He grabbed both of Merlin's arms and pinned him down."Get off of me!"

"Listen to me." Merlin stopped and looked at his best friend in the eyes with fury building up from his stomach, the words flowed with power through his lips as he said "_onwegascufan_" making Arthur fly off of him, giving Merlin a moment to flee.

"MERLIN! IM SORRY!" The words tore through the air causing Merlin to slow down; Arthur rarely apologized so he was going to at least hear what he had to say.

"For which part? the part where you wanted to hurt Kathryn or that you cant trust me."

"I didn't mean that all people who have magic…" Arthur horribly defended, "I trust you."

"Not all people who have magic do horrible things with it, its the choices they make that define them. Morgana made the wrong choices, i haven't always made the choices i wanted to, but i made the choice that was best for you and for Camelot. The sacrifices I've made! I cant do it anymore." As Merlin spoke his peace, Arthur just stood truly listening to every word that was spoken. " Im sorry Arthur, i didn't mean…"

"Yes You did. You are absolutely right, i have been blinded by the acts of Morgana that I haven't giving much of an chance for anyone. I have known her my entire life. i thought she was good, one of the best hearts in the world, how she could…"

"She was blinded by hatred Arthur, she felt alone and like a monster."

"Is that how you feel?" Arthur knew, he truly knew that Merlin had magic, and they were discussing it openly, the joy and relief flooded his soul and made him want to share every detail with his friend. " That is how i felt most of my life before i knew of the purpose of my power, unlike most i have magic as a part of me, it came on its own at first at the most inconvenient times, when i was scared or angry, but eventually i learned to harness them."

"You said purpose…what is your purpose Merlin."

"Exactly what i have always said, to protect you so you will be the greatest King Camelot will ever know."

"Thats a lot to live up to."

"Well you've got me on your side."

"Do i?" Merlin was shocked by the inquiry, of course he would always be on his side… "Would you have left with Kathryn or would you have returned if i had not followed you?" It was a fair question to be sure, but to be asked was unthinkable. To leave Arthur when his future was Merlin's destiny was a wrong choice, but he was going to make it, he couldn't lose someone so close to him again. "What sacrifices were you speaking of? There is much more to you and your life than i know isn't there?" Merlin didn't know what to say. of course there was! He was told of the prophecy from the dragon that use to be locked inside the castle, that he had released. His father was the last of the dragon lords who was killed while trying to return him to Camelot and save them all from the ferocious dragon, and in this event passed the ability to master a dragon to Merlin thus creating him as a dragon lord. He had lost so many, Will, Kathryn and Freya…so many moments in his life that he barely spoke to anyone, including Gaius. "Arthur, I will always be on your side. Not matter what happens, you are a brave prince and you will be a Great King, no offense but i don't think you'll get there without me." They both laughed, thankful that the tension was weakening. "Go get your horse. You are going to need it tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes when we go and find Kathryn, together with the knights. You are right, we may need her and i will do everything in my power to keep and open mind."

"Really?"

"If i don't…thats what i have you for. now get your horse." Merlin shook his head with a smile and he breathed "_edhwlerft__Miliani_" Arthur waited like a child on their annual anniversary, curious to see if indeed the horse would return, Merlin looked back with a feeling of acceptance as the horse made its way through the trees. "Did you know that your eyes turn to gold when you do magic?"

"They do?"

"Yeah, how have I not noticed that before?

"because you're a clotpole."


	33. RETURN

_Hello everyone! Apologies for the ridiculously long delay, I have had the mother of writers block for the past few months, but it is slowly fazing away and I have begun again on my tale of Merlin, Arthur and Kathryn. I hope you enjoy and I don't disappoint. _

_*ALSO* THANKS TO ALL OF MY REVIEWS AND THE NEW READERS! _

_3 your secretkeeper3_

It was past sunset when Kathryn made it back to Camelot. The entire way she contemplated what she needed to do or say, but was thankful for the overwhelming sense of purpose that rushed her body when she met the grounds. She had known from past experiences that going back empty handed was never a positive situation and that with Prince Arthur she had to prove her loyalties. Her information about Vincent's employer having custody of the bracelet from her bag was something that she could offer, but that wouldn't be enough, it defiantly wouldn't be for her, but then again she never trusted anyone.

With caution Kathryn made her way through the castle and sensed her way toward the overpowering emotions from the Prince's chambers, she was thankful for the return of her powers even if they were slowly returning. With a deep breath she knocked gently on the door. "Enter" he called from the other side; Kathryn repressed a giggle as she tried to imagine living in such refinements.

He did not see her as she entered, he kept behind his desk staring out his enormous window, "make sure the horses are fed and rested, we will be riding at dawn." Kathryn had no response to that so she stood in silence, and with the lack of communication Arthur turned, his face was shocked by her presence. Kathryn locked eyes with him and refused to break, she had to show worth and confidence, she would make him understand that she was never going to go against him.

"Where are you heading?" she responded to his silence, he smiled "looking for someone." He seemed almost happy to see her.

"Is that so?"

"Indeed. I have a dear friend who is worried about her." This made her heart sink, and swell, Merlin was going to look for her, but now was not the time to allow emotions to eclipse her judgment, "As you can tell there is no need for that." she responded without falter.

"Kathryn," Arthur began, holding back his frustration immaculately well, impressing her more than frightening her, "why did you run…no wait. No. I want…I order you to go find Merlin and let him know that you are safe. We will discuss this tomorrow." Kathryn knew of the great future this man would have, the kindness the acceptance the heart, but to experience his pure humanity in person was unlike anything Kathryn had ever witnessed. "Your gentle highness I will do as you…order, but I must tell you what I have discovered." Arthur took a moment to consider what she said, but before he had a chance to say anything Kathryn continued "I am on your side, and not because of Merlin, but because of you, what kind of world you will create when you are king. When I was a child I was captured by a witch finder, he had in his possession a bracelet that had the power to take a soul from a person and switch it with another. I took it. That was what I was keeping in my bag, the only problem is I don't know "who" they are." Everything came out in one breath and Kathryn hoped that the prince had followed it, she was becoming less hopeful until he responded in an expected way, he walked over and put his arm around her, " We shall discuss this tomorrow," he repeated walking her to the door, "We all need rest, and Merlin needs to see you." It was difficult for her to ingest that anyone would want to sit on such information. However, who was she to argue with the greatest king the world will one day know?

"Yes Prince Arthur." She whispered as she exited and began down the long corridor. "Oh and Kathryn!" he called "do not make me regret my trust in you please." Tears welled in her eyes, her heart soared it was what she imagined pride felt like; she smiled and continued on her journey to the physicians quarters.

It didn't take her long to find it, her body lurched in the correct direction like a plant to water, and soon she found herself on the other side of another door of someone she wasn't sure how to react to. Quietly she made her way inside. Gaius was asleep on his cot near his mountain of books, he appeared peaceful, but deep in his subconscious he dreamed of a woman named Alice, and sorrow draped his soul. Kathryn suspected love could have a deep lasting affect on everyone.

A light flickered behind Merlin's closed door, he was still awake. Would he be happy to see her? Angry that she left? The unknown always made her uncomfortable. When she entered she found Merlin sitting up in bed with a book in his hands, he had fallen asleep. She took the book from his arms, it was full of information on magical spells, enchantments and mystical beings, a book she wouldn't mind taking a look at herself. There was a draft coming from the open window, so she wrapped him in his blanket, she blew out the candle and walked over to the window. The view. The view without a doubt in her mind was one of the most magnificent sights she had ever witnessed. Would she remain here? The thought intrigued and frightened her, she never "stayed" anywhere, but what was out there for her now? Everything that she searched for and ran for was here, sleeping in that very room.

The silence shattered by the most beautifully haunting voice that echoed through her ears, "Please tell me I'm not dreaming."


	34. MOVING FORWARD?

_She looked cold and worn down, Merlin wondered if the remedy for the Dragon Venom was beginning to fade, for he also noticed the light in her eyes were dim. "I see you have been studying." she smiled holding out the book of magic Gaius gave him when he first arrived in Camelot. _

_"I have learned a great deal."_

_"you must teach me." Merlin nodded but didn't know how to move forward from that, so they remain silent, staring awkwardly at one another for a ridiculous amount of time. She stood there drenched in the moonlight coming from the window, as if to only be in the sky to light her way. A sudden attack of faintness took her over, but she ignored it as if it were something that happens regularly. " Are you alright?" he questioned beginning to stand, "I will not lie to you merlin, it has been a rough few days." she admitted as she placed a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place._

_Merlin felt her energy as she sat at his bedside, "i was afraid i would never see you again." he confessed " I had hoped for your return, of that i would find you, in spite of you talent for disappearing without a trace."_

_kathryn shivered at his statement and shook her head, "I have only had the opportunity to show that skill, but believe me i have many more." Merlin wasn't sure if she was trying to convince him of that or herself. He took her strong delicate hands and held them tightly, " you have no idea how incredibly special you are." he kissed both hands " now, you get some rest and we will continue this tomorrow." He rose and headed for the door._

_"No no no!" she exclaimed in a harsh whisper, "you sleep here." merlin laughed and crossed his arms "Do not try to have this argument with me."_

_She had no rebuttal, but simply stated "you're no fun."_

_"no i am tired" which was not entirely true since adrenaline pumped through his veins like fire, "get some sleep." _

_Kathryn rolled her eyes as she smiled "Good night Merlin."_

_Merlin opened to door to exit and whispered "Good night my Black Star."_


	35. QUITE THE SURPRISE

She waited past sunrise to see Arthur and Merlin off on their quest when Gwen grew concerned that they had not gone. What had happened? were they not going to find Kathryn? How would Merlin deal with that? She would not have it, how many times had Merlin gone above and beyond to help Arthur without any qualms, but when Merlin really feels strong about something, Arthur _should_ reciprocate.

All of this would be said to her prince, in a confident and rational manor, if she could help it. More than a few times she has crossed her place, she had reason every time, she just had to pay more attention to not do it. Especially in front of anyone else.

So when she entered sternly into Arthur's bedroom without knocking, an already failed attempt by being gentle about the situation, she was taken aback by the sight of Kathryn having a meal with Arthur and Merlin.

Kathryn was in midsentence when the door was pushed back, her smile large and her eyes sparkled. "Gwen, are you alright?" She asked standing, "I didn't hurt you did I?" Gwen shook her head no as they embraced, immediately she looked at Merlin, "she's back." She mouthed to him he responded back mouthing "I know." The excitement was strange, by the lack of strangeness. There was something about the four of them sitting at the table having a meal that felt…right.

"Please Kathryn continue," Arthur offered genuinely as he took Gwen's hand, there was not another sensation that resembled when he took her hand, as if it was second nature to him. Pride mixed with love and a hint of adrenaline, exciting, but dangerous.

"Yes of course, where did I leave off?" she responded looking at Merlin for an answer. "Right, when I was ran away from the witch finder I took the bracelet."

"Yes the bracelet that switches souls." Arthur began, "You had this in your possession for a very long time."

"Indeed, I had to make sure it didn't get in the wrong hands."

"Yes but why you? You could have..."

"No I couldn't, I've seen what it can do. The best way was to keep it lost. If no one ever found it, then no one could ever use it."

"That is a sad life." Gwen whispered, only realizing it was out loud when everyone looked upon her, Merlin looked down at his breakfast, then back to Gwen. "I'm Sor…"

"Don't be," Kathryn interrupted, "it is a sad life, but it also has purpose. My father taught my brother and me that there is always a bigger vision and we are merely tiny pieces that help it mold together."

"It doesn't have to be so sad anymore. You have us." Arthur said with a smile, this was a considerable change than Gwen had last witnessed from her prince and it excited her. She hoped that this would all work out, and it was better than she could have dreamt of. "Now last night, you said you didn't know "who" they are, these people that took it, but you have to have some idea. You've been protecting it, who has tried in the past?" Arthur continued. Kathryn took in a deep breath and shook her head, "Once the witch finder, was killed, didn't know that then, all I knew is that he disappeared, I was left alone. Except for the rare occasions that Vincent and my paths would cross."

"Does this Vincent know you have the bracelet?"

"No I kept it hidden, until recently." she shook her head as she faltered her words. It was difficult for her to trust, she made that perfectly clear, but she wanted so desperately to as well. Conflict was in her eyes for a moment until she extinguished them and continued "I had a vision a few weeks ago. Someone had the bracelet in their possession and was using it, I could not see who it was, and it was all a blur." She began rubbing her head, "I heard screams and swords clanging. Last time I heard something like that my brother died."

Gwen remembered the day Will was killed saving Arthur, mixed emotions over came her, she was thankful that Arthur was alive, but guilt soon hit with the pain Merlin had experienced and now seeing it in Kathryn's eyes…how was she to feel?

Silence spread them all.


	36. STARLIGHT

*Hey Guys it's me….sorry for the horrific delays…I started this story not having an idea where it would go or that anyone would like it. I don't have any real excuses except that I was having as you read before a major writers block and once that went away, I had a few health issues then I finally got my business started so had some producing to begin. Now I will try to get this story finished by the end of summer it is my goal and I hope you like it. Please leave some reviews if you want, they always make me feel like I have accomplished something :P

Love you guys!

3 your Secret Keeper

"It's not the safest plan." Merlin muttered as he propped himself against the tower wall. Kathryn let herself take in the man in front of her, this sweet, powerful man that was once a little boy who chased her around the woods in Ealdor. "I don't know if this is a good idea." He turned with those piercing blue eyes. She felt the smile sneak onto her lips, "It will be alright, plans change as things happen."

"You know what I mean; Vincent makes a career with trying to kill you."

"This is true, but he asked for my help, can't really ignore that." It was very obvious that none of her answers brought him any comfort. "Merlin, what is it?"

"What?"

"_What?_ What is your hesitation? You know better than anyone the risks that need to be taken to keep Camelot and Arthur safe." He shrugged as if he didn't know what she was talking about, " you haven't got a clue do you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Enough with the questions."

"Well you never answer anything." He pouted, making Kathryn cross her arms and roll her eyes. " It isn't easy merlin to know things, when you are unsure what other people know. Keeping everything a secret is better than expressing every piece of knowledge I possess and it getting to the wrong people. It is hard not to trust anyone, especially when I want to more than anything,"

"I know that." They remained in silence as they watched the sun fall behind the horizon, it made Kathryn yearn to be back in her dream with her brother, in their own little world, the lushes colors, the warmth if the sun and the company.

"How did Vincent ask for your help?" Merlin whispered as if to himself, Kathryn glanced over and met his eyes that somehow sparkled even brighter in the starlight. "I was not visible to them, did I not tell you?" Merlin shook his head, "Oh Freya kept me from them, my powers weren't working."

It was as if a force had exploded in his gut making him leap a foot away from her, "Merlin are you alright?" Tears began to expose themselves, "Freya is alive?" he asked hopefully. Freya. How could she be so stupid? OF course…he was in love with her.

Kathryn took a deep breath, hoping the surging pain was not so obvious, "Her spirit still lives on, she is attached to the lake." She felt her breaths become more and more shallow, and her body began to shake, feelings never had this effect on her. "I'm so sorry you lost her Merlin." She whispered as she attempted her escape, she loved him, it was selfish. She was selfish, she felt anger and jealousy toward one of the most dearest people she had ever encountered. _Freya deserved Merlin's love, I don't, im just going to get everyone he cares about killed, _she thought as she reached the door.

She didn't even make it through the door when Merlin grabbed her shoulders, turned her and pressed his lips to hers.


	37. EVERTHING NOT INCLUDED

It was as if the world had lifted off of their shoulders and all that mattered was them. Their souls changed from a cool aqua to a warm gold, their hearts beat hard to be closer to the others and their energy was calm.

Kathryn felt the pain evaporate, all the sorrow and fear she felt for her entire life evaporated leaving sweet bliss, even her most beautiful dreams could not compare to the passion and completeness she felt at that very moment.

Merlin had loved Freya, but he loved the idea of her, she reminded him of his Kathryn, the special girl that was broken and needed to be mended. Someone who understood him and cared for him, who made him feel special and most importantly…safe.

" I…take….it that…this is not a mistake." Merlin said in between kisses, Kathryn answered him with another kiss, their passion was intoxicating, Kathryn began to feel her head whirl and to her inconvenience a vision hit her. It was a young man, a powerful being throwing people from his path, followed by a beautiful woman near their age, her long black hair waved crazily around her soft fair face and dangerous eyes. People were screaming and running from them; Arthur jumped in and was thrown by the boy. His body went limp next to a dead Guinevere and Vincent.

Kathryn pushed away from Merlin, tears flowed from his eyes, "That was Mordred and Morgana." He forced, "is it like that for you…everytime?" Kathryn shook her head, "Our plan isn't going to work."

"I told you it was dangerous."

"Really? I told you so?"

"Really? You are arguing with me?"

"You had a vision."

"I think we shared the same vision, since we were…well…you know." Merlin scratched the side of his head trying to hide his flushed cheeks, "we should go tell Arthur."

"No Merlin we cant. "

"Why not? If the plan isn't going to work we have to come up with something else. " Without even thinking about it, Kathryn took Merlin's face in her hands and kissed him again. "there are two things you missed." He took her hands in his and pulled her closer to him "they are?"

"They didn't have the bracelet….and we weren't there." She smiled knowingly.


	38. MONTHS LATER

Months had gone by without any word from Kathryn…Arthur was beginning to regret letting her go off alone in search for Vincent and the bracelet…it wasn't that he didn't trust her, he did, simply because Merlin did and if there was anyone that he had complete faith in it would be Merlin. Even though he kept his magic a secret, not that Arthur blamed him much ( he knew he owed his life to that …gift ) but nonetheless any time he could use it to tease Merlin he did.

Merlin bustled into his room, in his arms a platter, there was so much food there that it could have fed the army for at least a three day journey, "This…is…breakfast?" he questioned walking cautiously to the table, Merlin smiled wide "Yes sire, the future king needs a bountiful meal, have to keep that strength up." He quickened slapping Arthur on the shoulder as he opened the drapes, "better than calling me fat." Arthur joked as he grabbed a handful of grapes.

"Isnt it a glorious day?" Merlin oozed happily, which was very unlike his character since Kathryn left. Either Merlin knew something that he was not sharing, or he had gone completely mental, which prior to knowing his magical secret Arthur originally thought the latter, but now….what was going on?

"Merlin?"

"yes?" Merlin asked as he began to make Arthurs bed, "someone had trouble sleeping I see, lots of tossing and turning…" he tsked as he pulled the sheets into their rightful place. Arthur grabbed a piece of bread and sat watching his bright eyed friend, "merlin stop. Come and have some breakfast with me." Merlin gave his _I'm not buying that what have you done _ face that Arthur just shrugged off and handed him his plate, "Don't you have magic that can do that for you?"

"I don't do magic all the time Arthur, only when absolutely necessary, and even then I need to make sure that no one can see." Merlin stalked over and took a seat. Arthur felt his seed of guilt grow larger underneath his heart. "I am sorry Merlin that you were put in that situation…its just…father…"

"I have every bit of faith that this will all work out in the end." Merlin always had moments of wisdom, this felt like it was going to be one of them, it was good to have him as a confidant, a companion, most importantly and advisor. No one could make Arthur understand himself and the way of the people like Merlin could. Gwen was different she made him want to be a better man, a better leader and a better friend. When the day came he knew that he would be a great husband and then…the father that he always wanted. "Arthur?" merlin asked bringing him back to the present, "You alright?"

"I was just about to ask you the same question."

"what do you mean?"

"Ever since Kathryn left you have been brooding about everything later, but today you are…chipper. Something I need to know?" Merlin smiled and looked out the window as he answered "today I think is going to be a day to remember."


	39. COOL BREEZE

Gwen wished the anxiety could finally be over, that Kathryn would have found the bracelet and it was destroyed so everyone could once again be calm and happy. As she picked herbs in the field she hoped that her friend would arrive bearing nothing but good news, she always hoped this no matter what task she had at hand. She pictured Kathryn sending her a sign, a message, something that would give her some comfort, which made Gwen laugh at herself for Kathryn had never done anything like that before. Their friendship was so short that it seemed strange that the bond was so strong, even with Mor…it was painful to remember her dear friend, her sister, who was so overrun by anger and resentment that even the closest to her could not stop her.

Uther may have been heartbroken, but even he didn't bear the pain that Gwen knew Arthur to be in, the one person who use to always support him and help so willingly was gone, and now wanted him dead for the thrown. IT made her sick to think that her mistress would want her dead just to make sure that their marriage would not take place and the thrown would be rightfully hers. _If only Uther would not have made her feel so unloved and more accepted this would never have happened._ Gwen thought though guilt filled her soul as soon as she did, it was not all of Uther's fault for what Morgana had become, every decision she made was all on her own accord and she would one day reap what she sewed.

"Finding everything ok?" Merlin asked spryly behind her, he seemed much happier today than these previous weeks. "You look good merlin." He smile and posed just like his silly self would, he grabbed the basket from her arms " Flattery will get you everywhere Gwen, just make sure that you don't profess your love for me too loudly, Arthur may hear and you know how he gets when I win." Gwen hadn't laughed or heard Merlin laugh in what seemed like ages, but at this moment neither could resist and boomed until they couldn't breathe and their sides began to shriek in pain.

"I'm guessing you have had word from Kathryn" Gwen commented as she finally gained her composure, Merlin shook his head and looked off into the distance, "then what has set you into such a good mood, may I ask?"

"Don't you feel that?" he said as the breeze began, Gwen did feel it, it was a cool calming feeling, " it feels like it might rain," she said but looking at the sky there were no clouds to be found. Merlin smiled and took her hand, " maybe we can find some herbs near the lake."


	40. LONG AWAITED UPDATE

Merlin and Gwen rushed to the lake and what they found made it difficult for Merlin to breathe; Freya stood before them in flesh and bone.

"Hello Merlin. It is good to see you." Freya smiled calming him, happiness and torment filled every inch of his soul. "I have word from Kathryn." Her name wiped all the torment away from him and hope took its place.

"What does she say? Is she ok?" he urged wanting her desperately back in his arms; this caused Freya to laugh sweetly "I am glad that you two have found one another." She responded; more guilt. He had loved Freya; he was going to abandon his destiny to care for her, marry her, and be one with her. But he had lost her, and now she was standing with him face to face, glad for him.

"What does Kathryn have to tell us?" Gwen asked bringing Merlin back to the present, "has she found the bracelet?"

"I do not know, but she will be able to tell you herself, her presence is getting stronger so I suspect that she will be here any moment." Freya announced as she flickered like fire beginning to dwindle.

"How?" Gwen asked taken a back, Merlin touched her shoulder to reassure her that everything was alright. "Freya died not too long ago." He informed, sadness simmering in his soul, the emotion was also evident upon Freya's face; "she is a spirit of some sort."

"I was killed in Camelot. It was not anyone's intention for me to die." Freya added, but that was not the truth, Uther wanted her dead, she was different and magical so she was to be murdered for it, however it seemed that she was trying to reassure Merlin that he had not failed her. Didn't stop him from blaming himself though. "I flicker now because I am using some of my power to cover Kathryn from being seen. She is weak."

"Has she been harmed?" Gwen asked looking around with concern, this pleased Merlin. Gwen had such a tender heart, she wanted to care and embrace everyone with her love; she didn't judge anyone and if she did it was because they had already lost her trust, and even then she hoped that one day she would have the chance to forgive them. He knew that she desperately wanted Morgana to understand that she was loved and to release her vengeance, it was killing her that she no longer had her companion and that she was also a target to be taken down.

Freya flickered again, "she doesn't know when to stop." she whispered to herself, making a happy reunion more unlikely.


	41. THE RUN

Tree branches grabbed at her skin attempting to slow her down, but to no avail; her body flooding with relief. Morgana was far behind her and she could sense Freya's spirit surrounding her with love and protection, for which she was more than thankful. Kathryn sprinted faster, Freya was pure magic, but even the strongest entity couldn't last forever.

On her hiatus from her new found family she verified her intuition; Morgana had the bracelet and was going to use it in order to gain the thrown of Camelot; no visions had entered her mind nor did Morgana or Mordred console to her the master plan; Vincent and his henchmen were hired by the dark witch to free Kathryn from her living burden, and he was the one who helped her escape before Morgana had cast her final sentence.

The man once was thirsty for the tears from her eyes and blood from her veins, now flinched when he was instructed to continued his mastery, "You don't know her my lady, Kathryn will never tell you what you want to know, she is the most stubborn person I have ever come across; believe me my path has crossed many."

Beautiful, really wasn't the right word to describe Morgana, she possessed paralyzing blue eyes, long raven black hair and the presence of a dark angel. Standing in the same room as her made Kathryn feel beyond inadequate, her dark brown hair didn't flow like waves upon the sea and her eyes were just eyes. "I want to know how she could possibly be alive; she was infected with dragon venom, no one can survive that. You will make her tell me who aided her. If you don't I will find someone who will." Her threat made Kathryn shutter inside, though she didn't let it show; Morgana was much like Uther, he made a similar threat to Arthur when he told them of her mission.

She didn't flinch as the beautiful creature's face came inches from hers, " you will tell me what I want to know."

"That depends entirely on you Morgana." Kathryn stated shrugging, and fire flew from the eyes staring at her. "What exactly are you wanting to know?"

"Who are you?"

"Kathryn."

"I am perfectly aware of your name."

"Then why did you ask?" Vincent let out an accidental chuckle to the question causing Morgana to singe him with her thoughts, but he responded " I did tell you." Like a vulture Morgana focused back to Kathryn. " How did you survive the dragon venom?"

" If you took the time to know the effects of dragon venom you would know what properties could counter act them." It wasn't something that Kathryn ever planned on doing, but she could never just give in to an interrogation, she would always rebut, it was what she considered her best quality. "Or did you not devise the plan?" She continued taking a moment to look at Mordred who stood in the corner hiding from the light of the torch. " It is challenging to determine how you came to procure such a delicate item as dragon venom, since they are long deceased. That, and why me?" Morgana took slow steps around her, magic radiated from her body; she seemed very powerful, but most of the energy was based off of anger not by birth rite; she remained quite for a few moments giving Kathryn the advantage to observe her surroundings in their entirety. Not many people occupied the small stale room, defiantly could take out the non magic without much effort, but since she was not knowledgable of the power Mordred possessed the best choice was to stay and try to get as much information that she could.

When Morgana was face to face with her again she was hit with a vision; Morgana in battle with an older man, she could feel Morgana's fear, she scattered from him trying to defeat his strength and knowledge. He spoke to her but Kathryn could not hear the words, however the words caused Morgana to stand in shock and had tears begin to flow from her eyes. The vision began to fade away she finally hear once word whispered from Morgana "Emrys".

The faces that met her when she arrived back to the present made it rather apparent that she had accompanied the whisper from her dream and that it had meant something everyone in the room, the tension was so heightened that Kathryn had trouble drawing a breath.

Morgana took a step back from her "You know Emrys?" she choked, and there it was; her in. Kathryn sat straighter in the broken chair she was tied to, "Emrys." she simply repeated, with no emotion. Morgana stuck out her right hand and with some profound skill pushed Kathryn in chair up against the ceiling, her throat closed to oxygen. "Tell me all you know about him!" she screamed from below, her black dress flowed in the created wind. Vincent shrunk into the wall as everyone else ran out of the room, even the mysterious Mordred. Kathryn took a moment before she attempted to answer the dark queen, for when she did she needed it to be impactful, usually she would create a clever lie and web a back story, but now would be the moment in her life when she spoke the absolute truth; her secret will be revealed to more than those at Camleot,"until this moment I have never heard the name Emrys uttered,"Morgana scoffed, "I have visions, I had one of you. I believe it is from the near future; your near future."

"You have magic." she soften not moving a muscle, to her Kathryn suspected, was someone she may be able to connect with. Vincent growled something quite similar to _"i knew it_." yes all the years they had known one another Kathryn had possessed powers that could get her out of every obstacle he put in her place; every slap, stab kick and unmentionables she took them without truly fighting back, she responded to Morgana with "I was born with it." Then with a hint of drama she sent her ropes and chair flying and lowered herself to the floor.

The conversations that had passed were minimal and unimportant, the only thing that had mattered was that Kathryn spotted the bracelet clinched onto a staff that Morgana kept in a corner, the best way to hide something was within eyes distance and to make it seem as if it were not one of the most dangerous weapons imaginable.

For many weeks Kathryn had hoped for an opening to arrive for her to escape and finally it did; with the aid of Vincent. Not one word was spoken between them to devise any sort of plan, but the many years of learning one another to survive and to control they were able to read on another flawlessly. She thought of him with a small twinge of guilt as she ran, his reprimand for his ignorance in letting her leave will not be pleasant, but since Kathryn had no longer been a prisoner she was hoping Morgana would not murder him. A chuckle fell from her lips, never did she think that she would urge her nemesis to remain alive.

The energy she was following in the forest grew stronger the more she ran, she sensed that it was not just Freya leading her way, no it was something stronger something familiar; and something that she could cling on to. Home. That is the only word that fit her needs when she saw Merlin, Gwen and Freya by the lake; they had not yet seen her so she hurried to a hidden spot behind the trees where a small piece of lake resided and gave her self a once over. Defiantly not Morgana, but better than the broken bloody doll that had previously arrived.

As she made her way out of the trees she bumped into another being so hard they both fell to the ground; she looked over and found Merlin lying opposite her, she smiled "will we ever be anything but clumsy?" He smiled back rubbing his chest where she engaged "I sincerely hope so, or you will be the death of me." They laughed as they helped each other up; Freya and Gwen arrived "Well, you are in much better shape than we had believed," Gwen offered; Freya just shook her head with "she has much to tell you."


End file.
